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Saturday, July 31, 2010

Sadness around the corner..

So stupid to love someone who doesn't love u...
It's hurt when u love someone but the one who u love is loving someone else....
Sincerely from the bottom of my broken heart i love u...
but i'm understand who i am...
Silly me to love u...my fault to love u...
so hard for me...
i just want to hug u for the last n i'll let u go for ur happiness...
I will let u go even it so hard for me..
i'll ignore u

Thursday, July 29, 2010

My Memory

Saya rindu kamu..
saya syg kamu...
cmna sy mau berhubung dgn kamu..
camna sy mau tau isi hati kamu..
camna mau selesaikan benda nie if sy x dpt contact kamu..
sy syg kamu sgt2...napa gni..
OH GOD.....please give me a sign...
arinie kamu sgt happy di kelas..
rin ckp kmu dah brubah...kamu byk bckp dgn durg...
apa mksudnya tue..kamu mau sy pgi tgur kamu..
or cmna...
please..i need a hint...
if there was no place for me please...tell me..

next week my bday...
saya x tau kenapa buat pertama kalinya saya rasa berdebar...
sy rsa x selesa...mungkin sy mau tua sdh..
eee...i don't wan this kind of feeling...
seems like something bad happen..
maybe this year i couldn't have anything for my bday..
i miss my dad...
too cengengla me...

Actually...
i feel so sad...
so sad and sad...
i want to cry for whole day..
i want to make myself happy..
yes by..what u saying to me before is true.
i can't manage myself..
can't defend myself...
i don't know..
maybe if it's true that there's nothing between us..
i really2 want to change everything..

i'm not a doll..
my fault to let everything happen to me..
can't fix it by myself..
idiot beatrice!!

Wednesday, July 28, 2010

Hati ini

Di hati ini....
hanya Tuhan yang tahu...
Saya x tau apa yang patut sy bt skrng...
Chech Mate!
Mau teruskan x bleh..mau undur xbleh...apa plan seterusnya...
Sedihnya camnie...
Padan dgn muka sndri sapa suruh x pndai tuk cntrol dri tue..

my lOve~~
i know u doesn't want to hear my explanation right..
is it too late for me...
are u sure that u doesn't love me anymore..
for 3 years we've been together..
so happy be with u by...
so happy to be ur special one..
but now..everything change...
it's my fault...n i know i deserved to accept all of this thing..
maybe this is the punishment for me..

Uncle~~
please...i only have u rite now..
can u please understand me..
could u please give me some advice and support me...
i know this is my fault...my fault n my fault..
sy x bt apa2 pun..ya slh sy coz hmmm0)(*&^%$ dgn dia...
bt dia yg trik tgn sy then blablablabla...
eisk...sorry la..mls dah mau ckp psal nie..
ko dah jnji xkn ckp kn...
ko jak kwn sy skrng nie..

mR DeAr~~
owh....last night u make me surprise...
it's true bout ur attitude..


Thursday, July 15, 2010

BEbetH tHe GreAt

Lama dah x meluahkan apa yang terbuku di dalm blog yg setia nie..
Banyak perkara yang telah terjadi dalam seminggu nie..

~Pergaduhan~
and the worst is sy gaduh ngan kwn sy pnya gf...
for me it's okay actually..but i just don't like the way she treat my friend...
Rasa truk gduh d fb ngan dia...rsa truk bila gduh psal sorg lelaki....
rsa truk bila lelaki yang sy defend tue bt kslahan yg sma..
rsa lgi truk bila ditipu.....sy nie sapa? ya sy tau sy x pnting bt kamu..
dia lgi pnting..tpi pliz hargai sy....(^^,)

~Pertemuan itu~
ya..jjurnya sy sgt apy coz knal kmu...even sy dlm ssh or snang kmu slalu ada...
i'm not sure bout this feeling..but it's seem both of us falling in love...
waaa..mtila nie gni kn...i don't know what i've done...
sy syg kmu...syg sgt2..cma mau kmu tau tue...
sy ikhlas mau bt kmu happy...

Dear...
how come this thing happend..
i'm sorry....
i'm sorry

Friday, July 9, 2010

My Life

Sepertinya saya dah merosakkan satu hubungan yang terjalin...
Semua ini adalah kesilapan saya sebagai seorang teman...
Salah saya untuk campur tangan dalam urusan mereka..
Sedangkan perkara yang sebenarnya saya sendiri tidak tahu apa yang berlaku pada mereka..
Salah saya untuk terlalu melindungi..
Salah saya kerana memarahinya pada malam itu..
Apa yang harus saya lakukan pada masa ini..
Saya ingin menyepikan diri..

Thursday, July 8, 2010

In the middle of night

Papa...
Tahun lepas masa yang sama, tarikh yang sama...
Sekarang nie nong sedang packing barang tuk balik g tenom..
Masa tue mau bawa ur body there....
Pa...nong x pernah rasa yang papa telah tinggalkan kami...
Seperti sebelum nie..papa tau mcmna kehidupan kita kn..
Sekarang kmi dah xda tmpt mengadu..well u know mama..
Ssh sgt mau dscuss ngan dia...
Papa...i got my result..same like before..the same i want to told u last year...
OMG!! Pa i really can't believe this..really hard for me..
N if u know..mama love u so much...she said that she always had a dream bout u..
now she always not feeling well..don't know why...
abg also take an advantage with mama..
Mama always hope something from him and same like before..abg jony need to cover him....
Sist amy never change his attitude..i hate that oo..
really..if we are using only 1 sen pun of her money...OMG!!! like we are killing ourself oo....
Mamy life is getting better...her fiance give a good car bout them include mama, tutung and kakak...
You know what..last holiday all of us balik kg oo...
Aaron are so talkative..he like to share everything...
aaron lil bro xla manja sgt cam dia...
If u can c erica wif ann waa...so funny..
ann like to ejek his sist...if erica nangis dia pun bt mimik muka n nangis knon2..
xtau sapa ajar dia camtue...pastue kn punyala jht dia pa...
dia suka tarik rmbut n pukul org...cian apple...jdi mangsa dia..
Ya i forget to introduce u...apple are grown up..
dia xpyh ckp byk pa..like mumy like daughter...u know bibie better than me..
so can't explain la...hehehe...
Abg jony pnya relationship xtau la pa..hope can fid someone for being my sist in law a.s.a.p...
And last but not least..i want to tell u something...
last month i went to medical check up...the doctor said that my ginjal ada msalah...dia ckp sy overdoss..i nver think bfore do something rite..
so need to drink a lot of water...xbleh mnum bergas...
i try to follow the instruction but...hmpir sbulan dah sy msih skit prut pa..
i don't know...sy dah jaga pemakanan sy hbis2...sy mkn skit jak tpi blik2..
tapi sakit nie x berubah...i'm worried bout this..really2...
Klu ada cuti sy mau blik kg...
mau sruh anty bt med check up d hsptal..
dah gtau mama..tpi dia ckp gastrik...i don't think so pa...
nie my body....sist amy tkut ada mslah jntung...but i can run...xda msalah pernafasan so far.....nevermind la..as long as my body can handle it rite...pa..i stop here..i really hope u can red this...


Tuesday, July 6, 2010

ourself..

How pity we are...
How dare them are...
Don't she realize that u love he so much..
oh no!! please...back to the reality..
if i could...i'll take him from u..

Sunday, July 4, 2010

Hidup Seorang Manusia

Hidup seoarang manusia tidak dapat diketahui dimana penghujungnya...
Kita tidak dapat menganggarkan riwayat seorang manusia..
Sejak kebelakangan ini..sejak menghidap penyakit ini...
sering bermain di benak fikiran bahawa ajal telah hampir...
Tidak putus perkataan maaf keluar daripada bibir ini untuk meminta maaf...
Andainya memang sudah itu takdir buat diri ini...
Maafkanlah segala kesalahan dan halalkan semuanya....

Thursday, July 1, 2010

I will Always Love u..

I will always love u..
remember that song?
I know that both of us being so "dingin" since this holiday..
i do't know why..
i try to reach u but i can't..
it's hurt and i'm hurting myself..
i want to be at ur side like before.
but i know i can't..

xmau rasa perasaan tue lagi..
sakit bila melihat kau berada disisi orang lain..
maafkan diri ini..
u r not mine..
Apapun perasaan boleh disembunyikan..
tapi tidak pada diri sendiri..
saya sayang kamu..